SHALLOW HAL

REVIEWED BY CHARITY BISHOP

Our rating: 3 out of 5

Because of: sexual content, thematic elements

Rated:

Hal (Jack Black( is the kind of guy my dad has always warned me about... he's also the kind of guy that smart girls never even consider dating. He's, in fact, the kind of guy that we would like to string up from the nearest totem pole. Why? Well, for a lot of reasons... he has a big alter-ego, he thinks he's buff when he's not, he's self-centered, cynical, crude, shallow and sees only outer beauty. In short, he's the kind of guy who goes to bars to women-watch and dumps his model-perfect girlfriend because her big toe isn't the right size. He never seems to realize, however, that he himself is hardly the perfect guy.

All of this started when his minister father told him in crude terms on his deathbed only to date women with "perfect bodies." (Either he was a pretty bad minister, or he never read through the whole Bible.) Since that day, Shallow Hal and his equally shallow friend Mauricio have been on the quest for perfection. Unfortunately, as I said before, all the smart and beautiful women can pick out a jerk a mile away and avoid him like the plague. So he's forced into temporarily bachelorhood, which doesn't set well with his life plans. One day Hal is trapped in an elevator with self-help guru Tony Robbins who  tells him he's totally self-centered. In order to change Hal from being such a shallow jerk into a likable guy, Tony hypnotizes him so now Hal only sees the inner beauty of women rather than their physical shape or size.

Hal changes right away... to the horror of Mauricio, particularly when his search for a "beautiful girl" leads him to Rosemary (Gwyneth Paltrow). In the eyes of Hal, she's a breathtakingly beautiful blonde. That's what he sees because she has such a beautiful heart. But in reality, Rosemary weighs four hundred pounds. You guessed it... his friend thinks he's gone off the deep end. He can't understand why one of her cannonballs into the pool flips the neighbor's child into a tree... or why her clothes are so big when she takes them off... or why their trip in a canoe leaves him high and dry. The good thing about it is that Hal is learning how to see someone through a new pair of eyes. The bad thing is sooner or later this hypnosis is going to wear off. What will he do when he gets a glimpse of the real Rosemary?

The filmmakers and writers of Shallow Hal are known for their tasteless comedies filled with sick jokes, crude humor, and decadence of human life. At least with this film, they're attempting to cater to a wider audience with a story that they hope will show the difference between long-lasting beauty of the heart, and short term physical beauty. There's also a homage to the impression of the image of self-worth that a daughter is given to her by her father. (Does he tell her she's beautiful, that she has a wonderful heart, that she'll always be his little girl? Or does he focus on the way she looks and browbeat her down -- something that often pushes insecure girls toward anorexia.)

Hal and his friends have many discussions on women's physical attributes, often using crude terminology and crass language. There's a huge helping of innuendo, discussions on underwear, some skimpy revealing clothing, seductive dancing in a nightclub scene, French kissing, and a particularly tasteless love scene in which Rosemary disrobes for Hal (seen from the back) and tosses him her panties (which turn out to be huge). We see them in bed the next morning. There's also a side order of profane language, including the f-word, sexual and anatomical slang, among other profanities and abuses of God's name.

Even beyond the moral ruts, Shallow Hal isn't that great to begin with ... it has a hero that never really does become likable, and mocks obesity. Are you laughing at them, or with them? It's a fine line to walk, and many will believe they crossed over it. Girls already concerned with their bodies may not find this a very helpful resource due to its mocking nature. And even though Hal comes off as a little better by the end, he's still way out of bounds in his philosophies. His conclusion is that sometimes you have to sleep with fat women in order to make you feel better about yourself. Take your "feel better" therapy somewhere else, bub.

Do looks matter? To some degree, yes... but what's in the heart matters more.

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